Archive for December, 2007

The Day I Met My Wife In Junnah
December 31, 2007

My guide directed me to the location of a huge palace. I stood outside starring in amazement awaiting his announcement as to whose residence we had approached. He looked in my direction and said, “this is your place in Junnah, you shall dwell therein forever”. My jaw dropped. My eyes starring at the solid, beautiful structure of the building, I was overtaken by a state of shock. My heart almost fell from its place of creation. 

I looked around at the property and it was huge. I didn’t deserve anything I saw and I thought to myself, Allah has indeed been kind to me. I walked away from my guide searching for fruits although I wasn’t hungry. I read in so many pages while in dunya, the delicious taste of such fruits and I desired to experience that pleasure for myself. 

However, upon the moment I was granted entrance into Junnah, there was one question on my mind that I could no longer hold myself back from asking. I looked back at my guide and I said, “Where is my wife? Where is the woman Allah has wed me to?” My guide responded so quickly as if he expected me ask such a question, he said, “She’s inside awaiting your arrival. Go inside and meet her…” I grew nervous. I had never experienced such a feeling that shook my heart during my duration in dunya but now all of a sudden, I was nervous to meet the woman I would spend eternity with?

I temporarily shook off those thoughts as I made my way towards the entrance of the palace. I couldn’t help the fact that with each step I took, the feeling grew within me. I stopped to take a moment to regroup. I re-gathered my composure with a deep breath. I looked back at my guide to find support while desperately trying to conceal the nervous feeling within me.

He smiled and granted me some words of comfort. He said, “proceed forward, she’s been waiting for you…” I thought to myself, if only he knew how much I’ve been waiting for her. If only he knew how much I’ve been thinking about her, he would be shy to say such words.  

As I came closer to the gate, my attention got redirected to the bricks of gold and silver that had captured my gaze. I rushed to get a closer view. It was real gold and silver. It was so so shinny. I looked back at my guide and said, “Look, my house is bling bling”. I started to count the bricks and there was so many of them, I had to take a break. It was during my break that my guide reminded me of my wife. He said, “Haneefah is inside waiting for your arrival”. I looked at him with confusion and said, “Who is Haneefah?” He said, “She is your wife”. I thought to myself, damn…that is a beautiful name. But I looked back at him and I had to get something off my chest so I said, “do you see these bricks? This is crazy! Who can you bring the issue of a woman to my attention when my house is made of gold and silver bricks? You crazy so crazy”

I returned my attention to counting the bricks when all of a sudden, I heard some noise. I looked far to my right and I saw a beautiful woman working in the field. I rushed back to my guide and I said, “who is that? Is that Haneefah? Better yet, I’ll go meet her myself”. So I walked until I approached the beautiful young woman working in the field and I said, “Assalam alaikum”. She said, “wa alaikum assalam”. I continued the conversation and I asked, “who does this palace belong too?” I knew the answer to such a question but my desire was to talk to her so I asked her the first question that came to mind. She said, “It is yours, O’Master”. “And are you Haneefah?”, I asked. “No, my name is Safeeyaah and I am your maid”. I thought to myself, she is my maid? She is too beautiful to be a maid. If only my homeboys can see this maid of mine so I looked at her and said, “If your my servant, I set you free. Today is a great day so go and enjoy your freedom. Perhaps we shall meet, another time” She looked at me with mercy pouring from her eyes and said, “O’Master, Allah has created me to serve you. I gain pleasure from serving you. Go and meet Haneefah. She is inside”. I responded back and said, “Safeeyah, from now on, don’t call me Master. Only Allah has the right to be called a Master. Call me by the name my parents named me”. She agreed and I walked away from her.

I returned to my guide and I said, “Hey, that woman working over there is too too FINE. I know many brothers from dunya that would sell their souls to marry such a woman and she works for me? Why don’t you go over there and tell her to relax and take the day off. I’m in such a good mood, give all the workers the day off with pay, you hear me homie”. My guide smiled and before he could respond, I said to him, “I know what your going to say, I already know. Haneefah is waiting for me inside right? I’m going, I’m going, I tell you but don’t rush a brotha cause today is a big day for me.”

So I reached the entrance of the palace and I walked through the gate. I reached inside and I almost fell from the shock of the beauty coming from within the palace. I looked around and I saw more women working inside. I looked back for my guide but he was out of sight. So I said to the women working, “Assalam alaikum, today is a wonderful day. You women should go and relax for the day. Stop working, go outside and enjoy yourselves”. The women immediately stopped working and departed from the palace. It was a tactic I wanted to use since I didn’t know who Haneefah was and by giving the workers the break, I would find the only woman inside to be my wife. 

I continued my walk inside but the palace was huge. I wanted to find her but my attention got redirected to a silver drinking cup I saw. I grabbed it and took a better, closer look. It was so bright that it started to hurt my eyes. I kissed it as I proclaimed, “you are mine”. I spent so much time just looking at that cup, had I translated the time I spent to dunya time, it would probably be a few years in length. I loved my new cup and I held it tight in my hands.

 Soon afterwards, I heard some steps coming from behind me and I knew it was Haneefah. I heard her voice as she said, “Assalam alaikum my husband, I am Haneefah, your wife in Junnah”. I kept my back to her fearing the results of looking at her beauty. She continued, “I am the promise Allah has made you. I will remain with you for eternity. My beauty will never vanish and my love for you will never decrease. I desire you and only you”

I held the cup up to my eyes trying to use the reflection to get a glance at her. I saw the reflection of a beautiful woman and I thought the cup was trying to deceive me so I put the cup back in its original place. Haneefah said, “My husband, turn around and look at me.” So I reminded myself that my death in dunya came on the battlefield. I reminded myself that I was a soldier and I had no fears while in dunya. I participated in gun fights under streets lights, so where is this fear of looking at my wife coming from? I knew the feeling I was experiencing within me was new. I didn’t know how to deal with it, other than, taking it slow. But than I was like, forget this, I’m a man. Yes, I AM A MAN. So I rushed to turn around and looked at her.  Upon seeing her beauty, I fell down unconscious.    


The Quranic Anger Management Program
December 31, 2007

I completed the cycle of anger in such a short period of time.

The feeling started as I became annoyed at my sibling. It soon transformed itself to frustration and my frustration grew until I had become anger.

I stood in amazement, starring at my sibling while harboring the feeling. Thinking back, perhaps I had quickly completed the stages of anger due to the fact that I was lacking sleep or maybe I was just hungry therefore my patience was thin and my tolerance, out of service. But than again, who am I kidding? Those are all excuses I feed to my soul but I refuse to accept any of them.

On a normal day, it would take much for anger to enter my heart. My path crosses with many different personalities and sometimes we bump heads. In the event that a misunderstanding arises, I try to recall the lessons I learned while studying Seerah. Sometimes those lessons cause me to overcome any bad feeling that may find a path to my heart, while other times, I fail miserably in my efforts to practise my knowledge. But even in my failure, I learn new lessons.

However, they’re three types of people I can not stand. If I see them walking towards my direction, I turn around and take another path. On the days Allah, the Powerful and All-Wise, will’s for me to meet those personalities, hardly can any benefit be abstracted from such meetings. For the record, I can never claim that I hate the individual, but I will admit my dislike for some of the traits that exist within that person’s personality.

Over the years, I gave myself plenty of time to soul search, which in return, has allowed me to know my own soul. Interestingly, the biggest benefit I learned from soul searching was understanding my limits. In addition, such a mission has allowed me to come to terms with the fact that I can not stand certain personalities. For one, I dislike liars. Its true what they say, the truth does actually hurt. However, it’s better to speak the truth than to take the path of lies. If you aren’t able to control the words that come out of your mouth, than learn the practise of silence.

The second trait I meet, almost everyday, is the ignorant person. It seems they stand and wait for me on every street corner. Had they known that silence would conceal the ignorance they harbour and developed over the years, they probably would make some attempts to practise it.

The funny thing is, that same ignorance is what prevents them from searching for cures, which would allow them to overcome such an evil trait. Finally, the last of my disliked traits is actually the one I’d started to witness in my sibling. I watched over the months as I witnessed my silbling tranform into becoming a selfish person. Now let me take this opportunity to make my first confession in my Poetic Justice. I confess and declare in my Poetic Justice that, “I hate self-fish people”. I know earlier I stated the fact I can not hate an individual, but every rule has an exception. Besides, there is nothing in Islam that allows a soul to become self-fish. In fact, we will never succeed and taste true imam unless we develop loving for others what we love for our own souls.

Although, I walk in and out of my house and most of the times, it would seem like I’m in my own little world, doing my thang but in all actuality, I pay great attention to the events that happen around me. Including my house and the individual that live within.

My attentiveness or as some like to call it, “my paranoia”, has allowed me to witness the transformation of the personality of my sibling. Upon witnessing my sibling becoming a self-fish person, it was my duty to make efforts in assisting that individual but I quickly failed in my quest.

Through the wisdom of Allah, He caused an altercation to arise between my sibling and I. Through this altercation, I lost my patience and I needed to cool down and get away. I glanced at the clock and realized I had an hour and change before maghrib so I grabbed my sweater and departed from my house. I rememered a good halal chicken wing restaurant around my area, so with my anger, I set off to fulfill a desire. 

I came outside and made the first left at the end of my street. After a few minutes, I made another right on to another street. I soon found myself on a major road. Fighting off the feeling of frustration and plenty of useless thoughts, I looked up and saw a hijabi walking 50 meters in front of me. I naturally slowed down. Some brothers upon seeing a sister walking in front of them would probably cross the road, pick up the pace and leave her in the dust. But myself, I was trapped between thoughts nor is it my nature to run from sisters. But I slowed down and kept my distance. 

It didn’t help my frustration that she was talking on the phone and walking at a real slow pace. I had the option of crossing the street but in a little while I would have to make a right, so I remained on the same side of the street. I soon realized walking behind her actually caused me to restore some of my lost patience. Keeping alert as to the space between the sister and I prevented me from entertaining those angry thoughts and I was just about to free myself from that evil feeling until I decide to look down. I noticed my shoe string was lose but normally I would quickly bend down and tuck the string in the side of my shoe, however on this day, I had the urge to actually tie the shoe lace. Upon completing that unusual task, I looked up and I saw a man walking by the sister. So who cares right? Just a regular man, minding his own business, doing his own thing. Wrong.

Not to my surprise, this man walked by the sister without any rude comments. However, after walking by the sister, he looked back at her and stared and stared, returning to looking forward with a funny look to his face. What’s this man’s problem, right? Well, I was thinking that same thought so I decided I should find out whats his beef. When he came closer to me, I starred at him with sharp eyes, that resemble the eyes of a fighter in the battlefield as he approaches his enemy. I said to him, “So, whats the problem with that girl, walking up there?”. He looked at me with confusion on his face and said, “huh, what problem?”. “Well you keep looking at her with a funny look so I’m thinking you saw something that you didn’t know or like? So whats seems to be the problem?…”. He responded, “no no, there is no problem, I was just was looking at…” and that’s when I cut him off aggressively with my anger claiming stairs that reach the nearest heaven. I said to him, “yo, I don’t know what your looking at but that’s my sister…”. In shock of finding out that she was my sister, he said, “I didn’t mean anything by the look, I didnt mean anything..”

My frustration that was starting to disappear had now reached it’s peak. I looked at the man and with my anger, I walked away. For some evil reason, I was kind of hoping he would say some stupid comments that would justify me to take some action that would “some how” lower my level of frustration. In other words, I wanted to take the matter into my own hands. I know that’s not the best way to solve a problem, but he disrespect my sister and I couldn’t allow that to happen. I remember an incident in the Seerah when the Prophet (saw) started a war with the Jews because one Muslim woman was disrespected. A Muslim man in the marketplace witnessed the disrespect of his sister and decided to defend her until the Jews ganged up on him and killed him. InshAllah when I make it to Junnah, I intend to ask about that man and meet him before I occupy myself with my wife who will request, I write romantic poetry for her as she enjoys the taste of a fruitful peach. 

I admit that I deal with my anger in a bad way. I’m not one of those individuals who yells and screams at the top of his lungs using all types of words nor do I solve my problems in a physical way, using my strength.

When I get angry, I shut down and close myself off. I wont talk to you. I probably wont even look at you. If I was married, I probably would take my pillow and sleep on the couch for like ten days. Silence is the method I use to deal with my anger. The reason I shut down is because I have a hundred thoughts runnning through my mind and I must go through them all. Therefore, I just need some time and space. But I’ll be the first person to admit, its not the best way to deal with this issue and I’m working on better myself inshAllah.

Over the years, I found one tool that helps me with my frustration and anger to be the Quran. If you turn on the Quran and listen to your favourite surah, from your favourite Qari, it really helps. It softens the heart and re-draws the bigger picture to life. You start to remember Allah, The Last Day, The Accountablity, Heaven and Hell. You start to realize that shaitan is encouraging you to hold firm to that feeling of anger which would actually cause you more harm than benefit.

But I got a long way to go in solving my anger issues. As for today, I’ve enrolled myself into the Quranic Anger Management program. Using the Quran to solve my issues.

I Want To Marry You But Its Your Fault
December 29, 2007

We’re living in a period of time where the means to find a suitable spouse is difficult. Sisters complain that no decent brothers exist and brothers use that same point as an excuse to delay marriage. In reality, our mindsets and methods to find suitable spouses don’t resemble the marriage sunnah and its simplicity.

The most intelligent person from amongst us may realize that we’ve been decieved in searching for spouses who possess qualities that are through the roof. What do we really want? Perfection? Well, that doesn’t exist. To sum up all of the “I want my potential to have list”, there is a common ground shared between them all. Although some sisters may have pages and pages of qualities for a potential spouse, in reality, all a sister wants is a brother who can lead her family into paradise. Likewise, all a brother wants is a sister who addresses him with respect and covers herself. That’s basically the “I want my potential to have list” without all the sugar and icing covering the foundation of the cake.

In stating that point, we’re also living in a period of history where our women have been forced to take matters into their own hands. The traditional “Hey mama, can you help me find a suitable spouse” method has become something of the past. Not to mention, the men who possessed the courage to knock on a potential’s door seeking her in a lawful matter have directed their focus on establishing themselves with worldly gain. It’s hardly acceptable for a decent brother who may be in his third year of university, pursuing realistic goals and has established a connection with his Lord, to approach a father for his daughter’s hand in marriage. The conversation would start and end something like this…

Father: So Ahmed, what do you do for a living?

Ahmed: At the moment, I’m completing my third year of university 

Father: University? And what do you study?

Ahmed: I’m in the Criminal Justice program

Father: Criminal Justice?…what are you trying to be, A POLICEMAN! Do you speak Arabic, Ahmed? Maybe you’ve been recruited to join CSIS?

Ahmed: Thats not necessarily the path or intention I seek, sir. In fact, I’ve already taken internship at Pearson International and inshAllah upon completing my program, I’ve been offered a position to become a Custom officer…but my passion is to join the Immigration field and so I can help Muslim families who are immigrating over here.

Father: So let me get this right, you’re in school and you want my daughter’s hand in marriage?

Ahmed: Yes, you’re correct. I attend school full time and I work full time. I have goals that are realistic and accomplish-able. But most of all, my trust in this life and in the next lies with Allah and He is the best of providers.

Father: Ahmed, you seem like a good boy so why don’t you come back when you’re finished university and we will continue this conversation…

That is a realistic conversation. Back in the days, marriage was easy, however in our present day, it has been wrapped with the cloth of politics and the deceptions of the worldly life. It is probably safe to admit the whole purpose behind getting married has been forgotten. And just in case you’ve forgotten the foundation as to why someone should get married, than feel free to take my “Hello, have we forgotten” quiz down below.

1) Have we not been created to worship Allah (alone)? No/Yes. 

2) Has Allah not created everything in pairs, including mankind? No/Yes. 

3) Has not our risq been written and sealed 50,000 years before Allah started the creation?No/Yes

4) Are we foolish to think that we have anything or something to do with our increase of wealth?No/Yes.

5) Do we just like to complain and do nothing about our current situation? No/Yes.

6) Why is everyone around me stressing marriage? Is it really that important? No/Yes 

Thank for taking my “Hello, have we forgotten” quiz and just in case you didnt know the answers, all the correct answers were YES! 

Well I originally wanted to name this post, “I want to marry you but its your fault” and looking at the title, I proceeded with that heading. However, after collecting the data from some of the brothers I decided to take the contents within the post in a different direction. 

From what I’ve gathered, some of the brotherly complaints can be summed up with one sentence and that is…”sisters, please get on the same page as your family before you ask me to approach them”

In other words, a sister may know a decent brother who (alhamdulilah) practices the religion to the best of his abilities. They may attend the same college and share a few classes. Through observing his behaviour and character she realizes that this brother is a suitable/potential spouse and would like to start the process of getting to know each other for marriage because it seems like he will never make the first move. Some may wonder, why are the sisters the ones initiating the process of marriage? Why are they the ones reaching out to a potential brother and why isn’t it the other way around? I have to admit, those are all good questions and the answer is not simple.

For one, a brother may have too much pressure being placed on him (not to say that a sister doesn’t). Pressure that is directed towards establishing himself in the worldly sense. It has been drilled into the heads of our men that getting “established” will make everything easy. Including finding that Ideal Muslimah. But any person with some level of knowledge may recall many incidences with the companions of the Messenger (saw) and their struggle to place food on the table for their families. That same person may also realize, how imam shined bright from the responses of the women from that time. Both the men and women from that period of time understood that everything was within the powers of Allah. I mean everything. Including wealth, risq, victory, defeat, love, hate, prosperity and adversity. That generation came to terms with the fact that any hardship experienced was but a test that can translate into blessings.

The funny thing about our situation is, we claim that we are the followers of the companions of the Messenger of Allah but we cant even place our trust in Allah when it comes to something such as marriage. Just remember, every individual throughout history stood as you stand and claimed something. Your claims are no different from theirs. Thats right, no different. Unless of course, your claims are supported with positive action. Action that is directed for the sake of Allah. 

The only reason I bring the issue of sisters addressing their families and gaining their support to life is because, it is an issue that needs to be addressed. I’m probably not the right person to bring this topic to life but somebody needs to. In addition, I’m a brother and I can also relate to their frustration regarding this whole matter.

In conclusion, all a brother really wants is to be given a decent chance to marry the sister who will assist him in his quest to acquire Junnah. Again, all a brother wants is for “the sister of his dreams” to approach her family and gain their support for her marriage. There is no point for a sister to proclaim her interests of marriage when her father doesn’t approve of such desires. If your father says, “wait until you finish your university/college before you discuss the issue of marriage with me”, than do yourself a favor and conceal your desires to get married until your father approves or Allah provides for you another way out. Either way, take your case to the court of Allah via the night prayer. 

Just remember that your intentions and love for marriage may be for the sake of Allah but without your wali’s approval, your marriage will forever be void. So sit with your fathers and seeks their approvals and when the news comes that you’ve succeed, we will be ready (inshAllah) to approach your fathers and seek your hands in marriage.

May Allah be with us. 

Lady’s Man Turned Religious (In Loving Memory)
December 27, 2007

     We spent our childhood together. Our families shared a tribal bond with one another. We were from the same country, the same tribe and our blood line was twice as old as the oldest woman alive. We were homies throughout life. He was known as the son of Umar.

     This brother was created with qualities that I have yet to come across. He was handsome, smart and had an amazing ability to play with words. Sometimes his words would get him into trouble…until Allah caused him to mature. It is with his maturity that he developed positive traits. He was not the perfect man but his character consisted a little bit of every positive known.

     In high school, he was the ultimate ladies man. His looks drew the eyes of women and his words captured their hearts. They loved everything about him. The other men in the school grew angry with him as he became the center of attention. I stood on the sidelines and I laughed. My laughter grew louder as I witnessed the eyes of men grow with envy. They were enraged with hatred but their coward souls fought to conceal their shame.

     Instead he paid those cowards no attention and kept adding to their flame. He would call me to share his spotlight but I was too occupied trying to develop the perfect stoke on my jump shot. It was not only the women at school who were fond of him, but it was just about any women who crossed his path. His words were deceptive but he claimed innocence. 

     In a free world, he would of been the Man from amongst the men. But we were living in dunya and Allah was its owner. They’re rules from Allah that we knew and must be obeyed. We were young but had no excuse to disobey Him.  

     In our senior year, he attended a different school than I did but we remained close. In one of our meeting, he confessed about a dream. He told me, he was standing in an open area, fearing for his life. He looked to his right and found all that he desired to be there and near while on his left, he saw a dark, thick, smoke presenting itself in the distance. So he quickly ran to his right but a caller stopped him. He remained in his standing position, fearing that the caller would tell him to enter hell…which was translated by him to be the dark smoke. Instead, the caller informed that it wasn’t open and inshAllah one day it will be and perhaps he shall enter it. He woke up from his sleep and grew in love and fear of Allah. He repented for all those evils things he use to do and say, and vowed to never return to that lifestyle.

     He informed me of all of this in our meeting and my brotherly love for him grew stronger. We helped each other in trying to do good while holding one another accountable for any wrong doings. He called me to good and I protected him from evil. The issue of women became forgotten, although they were still seeking to seduce him.

     Once he informed me of an incident regarding a sister. She lured him into picking some items from her house and dropping them off at the masjid. When he came to pick the materials up, she trapped him. He told me, he remembered the story of Yusuff but unlike Yusuff, his soul wasn’t inclining to commit zina with this sister. She insisted and demanded that J-J (his nick name) co-operate with her but he didn’t even bother to consider her offer and started to make his way to the exit. She grabbed him and he pushed her away. That is when she struck him hard with her hands across his chest. At that moment, he didnt experience any pain from her hands and so he walked right through her and into safety (may Allah be pleased with him and may Allah forgive the sister Aameen).

     He told me the most interesting part about the story was how…hours later, he was sitting in his living room and out of no where…he started to feel some pain in his chest. He took off his shirt and saw a bruise. He made a dou’aa to Allah seeking to make the bruise as a sign of His love on the Day of Judgment (may Allah accept his dou’aa).

     In 2005, when I went to visit Djibouti, I saw him there. He told me how he made hijrah and was never intending to go back. He started working with his uncle, who owned an importing/exporting business. I was so happy to see him cause I hadnt seen him for such a long time. I remember I spent four months in Djibouti during that summer and for the whole term, I spent it with him. We did everything a tourist can do but most of all, we prayed and remembered Allah together.

     When I returned to Canada, I got occupied with my life. School, work and family was taking up too much of my time. In late 2005, my mother requested for my presence. I walked into her room and I saw her crying. I asked..and I asked…what happened? And she looked at me with bad news trapped on her tongue. I was afraid to hear the news.

     She told me, my friend, the son of Umar and some other brothers got into a car accident and they’re dead. 

     My heart dropped. My mind blank. My eyes full of tears. My soul cried for my friend. That was the worse news and it caused me so much pain. News till this day that causes me nightmares.

     I remember his last words to me. When he stood outside my house in Djibouti and wished me a happy flight. He told me that we would see each other soon inshAllah. He told me that Allah is with us even if we are far apart.

     O’ how I miss my friend. My brother.. my companion…..the man who stood to my side in salah.  

Coming Soon
December 27, 2007

Topic soon to be discussed inshAllah:

The topic below was a request from a few brothers. Although I created the title and you shall soon understand how I came to that conclusion , the post will bring to light the issue regarding “our sisters making it difficult for our brothers” to approach their families and seal the deal. Im still working as a reporter collecting all the data from the brothers who requested I bring to the table such a topic.

Warning: This topic may come off a little bias due to the fact I’m a brother and I’m on the side of the fence. But I will inshAllah try to grant the sisters a voice in their absence even though some brothers may think, they’re case to be “weak”.

“I Want To Marry You But Its

 Your Fault”



Take Me Home
December 25, 2007

An introduction to a foreign language. A language ingrained in the souls of different men from different cultures. A language known as poetry.

Over 1400 years ago, Arabia’s source of media was no more than poetry. The market place of Mecca consisted of men who were skilled with words and knew the affairs of their people. They stood in the center of the marketplace and declared their victory on the battlefield. At other times, a poet would stand and bring together words unknown to man, illustrating his love for a woman. Their words magic but these men weren’t magicians.

I dare not claim to be among the ranks of such men. Men like Suhail Ibn Amr who possessed a gift of speech. Instead I flip through the pages of history and recall the memory of such courageous, poetic men. Men that I envy.

Men that describe the burdens of the world and its joys. Who speak about love and hate, victory and defeat.  

Recently, I was introduced to the words of a poet. His words, raw. In addition, his words were an extension of a deep feeling I conceal within my heart.

This man is a poet from my time.

Perhaps I shall never meet him, even if he exists within me. We are strangers living ever so near.

He spoke about our Motherland and I listened. His words flowing to the gates of eternity to find their place of rest.

His words landed in my Poetic Justice.

Take me home where memory wonders
Through the land where I belong
Take me where the heathers blooming
And where hearts of art resound in poetry song

Take me home where the sea’s is raging
Where mountains are foggy
Sisters crying and where death told
Of young brothers uncounted

Take me home where hills are burning and
Poverty is thee golden trophy
Take me home- where freedom rings
In the morning hours
I hear her voice calling me
And driving down the road I get a feeling
That I should have been home yesterday

 But my feet’s are unknowing
I’m at the end of long rope
Loathing the air pollution
Propaganda and opinionated confusion
Bush pushing us to fight his own war
When my people getting burn by his budget Box
as grab the pen to write this paper
Standing on the threshold
With my eyes wide open
Fatigue sets in
Emotions are tire
As I set back -in thirst of motherland
That natured my childhood,
Memories flooding into my mind
Of happy home where I once stood
Long seen home-land still afresh
With the fragrance of dust and mud
the sight of cattle salvaging the greenery
the wailing of babies –tender as a flower mud
Oooooh lady liberty –TAKE ME HOME


“Sorry, I Dont Have Cash”
December 24, 2007

In order to follow along with me, I request one thing from you. I need you to release yourself from all thoughts while I bring to light and expose a tactic used by Shaitan.

I’ll give you a few seconds to free yourself from becoming trapped within thoughts. Have you succeeded in gaining your freedom yet? I hope so, therefore let us continue.

Have you ever found yourself walking on a busy street, in the midst of many people and Allah presents you with a great opportunity to earn financial security. I mean, out of no where, an older less fortunate woman presents herself to you seeking a donation. That is the ultimate opportunity to earn a good deed. Just think about it. You were minding your own business, going about your daily duties, attending to some need but Allah wished good for you.  

Through His wisdom and mercy, He selected to present to you the opportunity of freeing yourself from loving the worldly wealth and taking a step closer to His love. At that moment, such freedom is gained through sadaqah.

Perhaps you believe with certainty the words of our beloved Messenger, when he (saw) stated that charity doesn’t decrease wealth. In fact, what if Allah had installed within your character the love to give sadaqah but there was always one problem stopping you from fulfilling that goal. You’re probably thinking the problem is Shaitan right? In a way, he has his share of blame in everything wrong we do BUT pointing the finger at him will not be acceptable.

Remember the words of Allah when He, the Majestic and Most-High, says “And Shaitan will say when the matter has been decided: “Verily Allah promised you a promise of truth and I too promised you. But I betrayed you. I had no authority over you except that I called you and you responded to me. So blame me not but yourselves…”

Needless to say, Shaitan is to us an open enemy so lets abandon the mentality of blaming others for our wrong doings.

The problem doesn’t lie in shaitan but in our lack of preparation. More often than not, Allah has blessed us with the wealth to give for His sake but we become heedless in fulfilling the baby steps to accomplishing such goals.

Can you recall a moment where you wanted to give sadaqah whether at the masjid or outside but you didn’t have any cash on you? You were so willing to give and earn reward that you searched eagerly through your pockets but the only means of wealth you found were debt cards? That right there, is the result of Shaitans efforts.

Over the years we’ve developed the mentality that carrying cash is not good but with such a mentality, we’ve actually lost more than we’ve gained. All of those opportunities to give sadaqah, gone. All those potential good deeds, gone. A financial security guarantee from Allah, also gone. We, as Muslims, have been deceived. 

If only we took a path to better prepare ourselves, perhaps success would’ve become the talk of our generation. But its never too late to change for the better. We need to learn from our mistakes.

Allah states the solution to such a problem and also the punishment if we don’t change our way of life. All of this is mentioned in the blessed Quran.

Allah mentions the criteria to over coming such problems and they are, “If they had intended…”, which re-enforces the importance of making a good intention, “they would have made some preparation for it..” therefore let us become those who hear the words of Allah and obey.    

In addition to the solution, Allah also warns us about the punishment if we shall incline towards such a life style.

He, the Majestic and Great, says “He will punish you with a painful torment and will replace you by another people”

Never forget, Allah stands in no need of any of us. If you find yourself ignoring the duties of Allah, you may also find yourself on the outside looking inward. Therefore let us strive for strength, that is to say. individually and as a nation.

May Allah protect us (Aameen)

Lessons Through Pain
December 24, 2007

I rushed through the hallways of my house, reaching for my uniform while glancing at the clock. I was running late for work and I couldn’t afford to waste any more time. I quickly dodged my family members as I rushed to the front door, ignoring their requests for my attention. Surely, that was the beginning to what would become a painful night. 

I arrived in the entrance section of my house as I stood over my shoes. I noticed a moving motion from the corner of my eyes and my paranoia led me to look up. My gaze fell on my beautiful baby niece and I smiled with joy. I wanted to hug and kiss her but I was running late so instead I blew her a kiss, while saying “Peace out baby girl, catch you on the next turn”. I was gone. I rushed into the dark night like an Arabian fighter racing through the desert heat.

I reached the elevator and signaled for it to come. That is when my second mistake occurred. Shaitan caused me to occupy myself with my watch and therefore I forgot to seek Allah’s assistance in making it to work safely and on time.

I finally reached the ground floor of my building and again, I accelerated through the front doors, ignoring the greeting of a neighbour. Needless to say, which was another mistake.

It was a cold winter night. Throughout the day, we had been experiencing freezing rain. The conditions to walk were awful, let alone the drive to work. But at that particular moment, there was only one-thing on my mind; I got to make it to work on time. So I flew through the front doors at the speed of a wild African hawk, ignorantly ignoring the poor conditions.

I jumped over the first set of stairs reminding myself of the strength which Allah had placed into my young strong body. I was gaining confidence in my abilities to make it to my car safely which was another mistake. Until the moment of truth came. Until Allah corrected me for all those mistakes I had committed. 

See what happened was, while moving at a high speed, I reached the second set of stairs and like the first, I set myself to jump over them. As I took my last step and entered the motion to jump, I realized my footing had landed on black ice. My feet flew into the dark sky. My back straightened, I found myself in a vulnerable position. I was literally flying through the air. My feet were positioned high while my head low, I couldn’t but help to ponder over methods to lessen the pain of the impact. Flashes of memories ran through my mind. I could recall the incident with my niece, when I blew her a kiss and some how, I wished I could have just walked up to her and given her a proper goodbye while making dou’aa for her sake. Instead, I was flying through the air and I felt  myself frozen between the sky and the earth. 

But shortly after, reality introduced itself. The concept of what goes up must come down, became known to me. The impact was painful.

For the next 20-30 seconds, I could only see darkness.

After my senses returned to me, I found myself laying on my back overtaken by pain. The same body that was flourishing with strength couldn’t move. So I looked around for an individual who witnessed the collision, but the streets were empty.

I was in no shape to rush my body, so I took a few moments to regroup. I remained there looking into the sky, recalling verses from the Book of Allah, the Majestic and Most High. I was amazed at His creation, in particular, the strength coming from the Moon.

I knew that such pain was a result of some wrong that I had done. Although my head, back and just about every part of my body, was in a state of pain, I managed to recall my actions. I remember the wrong I done to my family members. I also recalled, my crime of not returning the greeting of a neighbour. But most of all, I forgot to say inshAllah.

I was in a state of pain and the lessons became known to me. How foolish would I be, if my only means to learn was through pain.

They’re people from mankind, who remember Allah only when adversity touches them. But when He removes such problems and pain from their hearts, look! these same people, walk on the earth as if nothing had happened. By Allah, I will do anything to aviod joining the ranks of such people. I seek refuge with You, my Lord.

Lessons I gained through my experience of pain. 

1)Remember Allah in times of prosperity and He will remember you in your times of adversity.

2)Offer your assistance to your brothers and sisters who are need and Allah, the Majestic and Great, will grant you His help on the Day you shall need it most.

Courage: Something of the Past
December 23, 2007

Glad tidings be to the believers who stand firm during the hardships of the life of this world.

Glad tidings be to the men who defend life with dignity and don’t lend an ear to the blame of the blamers.

Would it be fair for me to ask, what happened to courage? Has it become something of the past? Has it disappeared into the pages of history?

Don’t we contemplate over the events of people of the past, in particular, Musa’s encounter with Bani Israel?

Remember when the Children of Israel, along with Musa, stood outside the gates of the holy land and Musa encouraged his people to fight with a promise of victory from Allah.

Allah, the Majestic and Most High, mentions the conversation between the two parties.

Allah reveals Musa’s command to his people when he said, “O my people! enter the holy land which Allah has prescribed for you and turn not on your backs for then you will turn back losers”

Keep in mind that Bani Israel requested from Musa that he invoke his Lord and seek permission to fight but when the order came down from Allah, how did they respond to Musa’s command?

Allah says, “They said: O Musa! surely there is a strong race in it, and we will on no account enter it until they go out from it, so if they go out from it, then surely we will enter”

SubhanAllah. Look at their response. They requested permission to fight. It was not only granted to them but it became a command from Allah, but their lack of courage distroyed that nation.

Not only did they refuse to fight, they said to Musa, “O Musa! we shall never enter it so long as they are in it; go therefore you and your Lord, then fight you both while we sit here (and watch)”

May Allah have mercy on Musa for indeed the Children of Israel caused him much pain. With such foolish responses from his people, Musa raised his hands towards the heaven and made a supplication against them. Musa said, “”O my Lord! I have power only over myself and my brother: so separate us from this rebellious people!”

Allah answered the dou’aa of Musa and as a punishment, Bani Israel wonder blindly in the land for 40 years. During this span, Huran (as) passed away. Musa granted permission to the angel of death to take his soul and therefore died outside the holy land without ever getting a chance to enter it with his people. Not to mention, that generation of people who refused to fight had become conquered by death and a new generation took their place.

Allah stands in no need of mankind and due to their lack of courage, they became replaced. A new generation took their place that were stronger, more obedient and possed courage.

As the scholar stated, “every event from last night will repeat itself tomorrow”. History but works in a circle.

Similarly, many men from my time, make supplications that seek their death to come while they’re in a state of sleep. They are cowards exposed through lack of silence. Surely death shall visit each and everyone of us, whether we reside in the East or in the West. While in the darkness of the night or in the open fields covered by the day light. None of us can escape such an event so why then would any seek to find death in their sleep except for the cowards. It would be more suitable for a believer in Allah to seek death while embarking upon the path of the great men of history.

Men like, AbduAllah Ibn Az-Zubair, Az-Zubair Ibn Awaam, Sa’d Ibn Mu’aadh, Mus’ab Ibn Umair, Khalid Ibn Waleed, Jabiir Ibn Abdullah, Khaalid Ibn Sa’iid, Urwah Ibn Amr, Abdullah ibn Jahash and the list can continue for pages. All of these men were firm believers of Allah and processed courage nor did they seek to find death in their sleep.

I am a follower of these men. I embark upon the same path and seek the same reward. Death has been prescribed at an appointed term, therefore courage doesn’t decreases life nor can cowardice extend it.

I’ve dedicated a page from my Poetic Justice on this subject.

It’s apparent,I’m surrounded from every corner by cowards
Who love the glitter of this world they hide behind walls of emotion
Who accept the deceptions of Western media and take upon false notion
While our people fight to survive another day
Our women getting rapped and married off to the occupiers of our Fore Father’s land

While we live with satisfaction
Despite the fact, our brothers and sisters getting killed
Our hearts feel no pain
While on the other side,
Mothers grieve over the bodies of their innocent dead children

Its time I stand and fulfill the covenant I took
The covenant of Tawheed and standing to defend dignity

While you sleep with peace
My heart can’t recall the last moment it fell asleep with such ease
I’m over-taken by dreams of battlefield scenes
Some fights victory is granted,
While other times,
Patience is most befitting for those who believe

My destiny got me joining gunfights in a mountain like scenery
And my heart bleeds for peace across Somalia and the Middle East


My Fear of Marriage
December 23, 2007

If you know anything about me, you’ll know that I promote marriage. I encourage it and speak out against those who dedicate their efforts to discourage others from taking such a fulfilling step closer to Allah. Since the Ramadan of 2005, I’ve been heavily campaigning for marriage, jumping from one circle of brothers to another, beautifying the idea of fulfilling half the deen.

The irony of my situation lies in the mere fact that, while I promote and encourage others to take this huge step closer to Allah, I have yet to act upon my own words. There seems to be a contradiction. I preach one thing while my actions show no support.

Which reminds of a story in the life time of Imam Maliik (in some narrations, it has been mentioned that this actually happened to Al-Hasan Al-Basri). There were many slaves that were under the care of the Muslims and so the leaders of his city asked Imam Maliik to speak about the reward of freeing a slave for the sake of Allah in his Friday Khutbah. So Imam Maliik agreed to encourage the believers to free their slaves, seeking the good pleasure of Allah, in one of his near future talks.

However, weeks pasted and Imam Maliik hadn’t mentioned the benefits of freeing the slave. So after many weeks, the leaders wanted to re-approach the Imam and remind him of their agreement.

But before such a meeting could occur, the Imam stood on the pulpit and dedicated his talk to freeing the slave. After the khutbah, many Muslims were so moved by his words that they started to free their slaves and the affects of his speech became apparent. Soon afterwards, the leaders approached Imam Maliik and inquired about the delay regarding the topic. The Imam stated that he didn’t own a slave to free so he disliked encouraging others while he, himself was unable to fulfill such words. So after gathering some wealth and purchasing a slave, he set him free. There after, the Imam stood on the pulpit and encouraged others to follow his actions. Due to his sincerity and the execution of his words, the fruits of his preaching became widespread in the community.

From this story, I learned so many lessons and among them, act upon what you preach.

However, with marriage its a little complicated so let me explain.

Some time ago, I was confused as to why I preach marriage and yet become so hesitant to fulfill such a step. Night after night, I would lay in my bed and reflect over my deepest feelings and beliefs towards the subject. I wouldn’t accept such answers as, “I’m still looking for that Ideal Muslimah so until I find her, I’m doing me”. Such an answer was too politically correct and if I was to accept it as an excuse, I wouldn’t be able to get to the root of my problem regarding marriage. Months literally passed and still, I had no answers as to why I was delaying marriage. Until one night, I allowed my soul to fully open up to me and through  that process I discovered the root of my problem. It made complete sense. It was not an excuse but it was the truth.

For the record, I believe marriage to be a means of success. Moreover, it is a vital step to protecting our iman and increasing our status in the sight of Allah. In addition to those points, I am shy to mention that zina is rampant in our communities. InshAllah I intend to shad some light on the issue of zina amongst the young generation of brothers because ignoring such problems wont lead to a solution. However such a topic is sensitive so I will carefully review my ideas and facts before posting on the subject.

As I was saying before I got side tracked with my next post, my discovery as to why I have been delaying marriage is acceptable? Well before it could be acceptable, let me share the reason.

The reason I’m delaying marriage is because I’m afraid of taking a woman under my responsibility. When I say responsibility, I don’t mean for dunya reasons. As for dunya matters, I can handle that responsibility inshAllah. My fear lies in the fact that I would become responsible for her akhira as she would have a huge impact on my status before Allah. The foundation of my fear of marriage is akhira and not the life of this world. I worry that my wife under my care, will become weak and lazy towards her duties to Allah. While I stand to her side encouraging her, day and night, but my words of support don’t lead to righteous actions. Mean time, what if Allah caused my heart to grow in love and fear of Him while my wife, the woman I took as a responsibility, falls behind in her worship. Regardless whether she would be in a strong state of iman or fighting to perform her five daily prayers on time, I could never (and I mean never) leave her behind. And how could I leave her behind when I accepted her as a responsibility. When I stood in front of her father like a man and looked him in the eyes, promising him that I would forever be committed to his daughter. That I would never abandon her, whether we get tested with poverty or illness, she will always be my wife and I would be to her a protector, a provider and the companion who shall accompany her on the long journey to meet Allah.  

Through marriage, I would forever remain committed to her and for that reason, I fear my passion to fulfill a commitment will destroy me.

Does the reason I stated above make any sense? Maybe the English language doesn’t bring justice to the situation I described above.

Honestly, as for dunya, I really don’t spend too much time stressing myself over this life. And why should I burden myself with stress when my risq has already been written and the moment of my departure from this world is but recorded?

Some time ago, a sister got into contact with me and stated her interest in marriage. She was shy to take such a step initally but I comforted her with kind words. Her bravery was impressive and she reminded me of those women who used to support the Messenger of Allah (saw) during his battles and so accepted her invitation to get to know each other for marriage reasons. Thereafter the correct individuals were notified and the process began. In one of our conversations in getting to know each other, she asked me a tricky question. She said, “is there anything that you would like to tell me or ask me?” I was amazed at the question due to the fact that in college, I took a class called Interviewing and Investigations which taught me all about open-ended questions and her question was living proof of the examples my professors would describe to us. However I couldn’t recall the methods on how to escape from such questions that the professors taught us, so instead I answered it with sincerity and requested something from her. She inquired about my request and I said to her, “If it turns out that we should marry and only Allah knows, could you do me a favor?” She responded, “sure, what is it that you request?” I said, “If we get married, I promise you one thing and I ask of you one-thing”. So I continued, “I promise you that I will forever be committed to you. I will assist you and support you. Regardless of prosperity or adversity, I will be your companion in this world and in the next”

Now that was the promise I made her but such a promise needs a condition. So I continued and stated my request. I said to her, “I ask you for one thing in return. I ask for your assistance in my entrance into Junnah”

In other words, I would strive and pull down the greatest mountains with my bare hands if need be, in exchange, all I wanted from her was to be reminded of Allah and some encouragement to DO MORE  righteous acts, in order for my worship to reach that next level. In the end, I fear I’ll end up married to a sister who is so occupied with this world, it would not only destroy her, but also our children.

And Allah knows best