Character Assasination

(A brother writes in regards to the situation…)

You have always meant good, dealt honestly with friends and family, somehow, you have always been misunderstood, making you even more frustrated. You’ve always felt that ” you know them, but they dont know you” but your day in court is due, but may not be in this lifetime!Word goes around fast labling you with malicious descriptions of character, and as time goes by, the lie takes a life of its own, you have been put in a box, even people who have not met you have a prejudice against you for no fault of your own.

It takes only a single person to spread a lie, once the lie is in the air, people fish for that chartacteristic about you in all of your actions, and they view you with suspicion from the start. The more you try to fight the allegation, the more believable it becomes, suddenly, you find yourself in a Rodney Dangerfield world of no respect, no matter what.

We Muslims take a credit for every Character assasination we participate in by way of believing or passing of gossip, ” Xanta “. We may have altered lives of great people, we may have denied many people to listen to them after we have circulated false allageation or by exaggerating these allegations to poison a well.



4 Responses

  1. Salamah

    YEah I could not agree more. Something small can cause so much damage. OFten even our jokes can be harmful. Xanta is something so evil and so underestimated by Muslims. May allah forgive us.

  2. Assalamu Alaikum Ameen,

    I just read your poignant piece about this apparent incident that has befallen you, after which I have become overwhelmed with sadness as it instigated memories of a similar experience that had befallen a loved one. I decided to pay your blog a visit and for the first time, share my thoughts (btw, great improvement since your launching). Going back to my story, seeing my loved one go through the most difficult and distressful phase of his life was, as you can imagine, unbearable for me. It was slowly draining the life out of me, leading me at times to lose hope and faith in human beings as I have never imagined they could be capable of hurting innocent people to this extent; I had never imagines people were capable of descending that low. Worse was the fact that the perpetrators were none other than his closest ones – how preposterous , I thought. I could bear the thought of a stranger hurting me and making outrageous accusations againts me, but a close one? How? How?

    Indeed, qadarallahu maasha’a fa’al, I believed in that and knew that it was a test. I sought refuge in Him, cried and implored Him to let justice prevail. But, I was a human being at the end of the day, and no matter how logical or rational I attempted to be, the pain was still present and staggering at best. What made this ordeal even more difficult for me was the fact that I needed to be the strong pillar others could lean on, I had to hide my emotions and encourage others to seek patience and maintain faith in Allah when in essence, I was the one who was shattered the most inside. Just the memory of it makes me shiver. Justice, by the will of Allah, was finally granted to my loved one and he came out the victor (as all believers through a trial will); however, the remnant of that agonizing experience has stayed with us even though it has now been more than 2 years. It will forver remain with me as it has rectified my outlook of life and my expectations of mankind in general.

    Forgive me for rambling on, but the lesson I have acquired from this experience and that I wanted to remind you of today is this: Allah puts the best of His slaves through the most distressing trials in this life, the more He loves you, the more tormenting the experience may be because He wishes to cleanse you from your sins and strengthen your connection with Him. He is only preparing you for the ultimate abode – we may not realize it during distressful times, but it’s a mercy we shall be grateful for.

    Therefore, my dear young brother, always remind yourself during these tough times: “Waman Yataqillaaha Yaj’al Lahoo Makhrajaa” . I know you know which is what I respect about you, but you are also insaan.

    Allah Ma’ak

  3. Salaam

    Ibtisam, welcome back. Aameen to your dou’aa.

    Sakeenah my sister, welcome to the blog.

    Firstly, thanks for sharing with us your story. I must of read it like three times because everytime I read it, it brought new emotions to the surface. I felt some of your pain and I could only imagine, how much more you still conceal down below. Stay strong my sister and may Allah have mercy on you.

    As for the lessons you aquired from the experience, it so so true (subhanAllah). We know from studying Islam, the Prophets are the ones who receive the toughest of tests and because of those tests, they will have the highest of stations in the next life. Their patience and committment to the cause of Allah and their faith in Him is truly something we should focus on. Honestly, alhamdulilah, I feel much more at ease with my situation. I remember Br. Nur and his example when he mentioned the story of Maryam and how her people accused her of committing zina. The thing about the acquisition the people of Maryam made against her, which in return, made the situation extremely difficult was the mere fact that she returned to her people after having been gone from them for a period of time with a new born child in her hands. Her people accused her of commiting zina and they pointed to Isa and said that is proof that they were speaking the truth about Maryam. Just imagine for one second how she must of felt? The trail she went through at that exact moment? If I took all of the trails I’ve experienced from yesterday to the day I meet my Lord, I dont think it would even remsemble 8% of the trail Maryam went through when she stood with her son in her hands and the liars spoke wrongly about her. I ask Allah to have mercy on her for she is the woman I would desire my daughter (in the future inshAllah) to take as an example of strength and patience.

  4. Thanks for the wlc akhi, it was just a matter of time; my visit was overdue 🙂

    You know, I am usually not the most expressive individual regarding emotions – I was always quite good at the art of concealing them, even from closest friends. The only One Whom I can completely and vulnerably open up to, confess and show tears to, is Allah caza wajal. Alhamdulilah, mine was a chapter I’ve attempted very hard to close, and succeeded, a while back. This was just a small gesture meant to serve as a consolation (even if quite minute) to a cyber friend whose story had touched me in a peculiar way.

    I am really glad you’ve managed to find solace in the midst of confusion and pain. Alhamdulilah.

    And yes, the story of Maryam (may Allah be pleased with her) is remarkable indeed; good for the soul.

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